Life with Nin

Uninterrupted Time

I had the opportunity to witness a little magic the other day.   We’d gone to the park day at Tree Tops Park and I joined a group of parents and kids for a walk over the wetlands and into the woods.  Toward the end of our walk was a wonderful, magical place, full of trees begging to be climbed and grapevines waiting to be swung on.  Some of the group stayed briefly and then went along, but a small portion of us stayed and saw the wonder of giving kids uninterrupted time.

I don’t know how long we stayed; no one seemed much concerned about the time.  We moms chatted and the kids had a piece of Neverland.  I heard only a few “mom watch me”s, far fewer than when we’d been at the playground earlier,  and, when the time came to head back to the cars, I heard not one “Aw, mom, do we have to go already?”

I have a hunch why this was, although I may be way off base here.    I think this happened because first, this really is a magical place and second, because the kids got to play for as long as they wanted/needed to.  No one hurried them off to the next thing.

I’ve been thinking about this issue of interrupting kids at work/play for the last several weeks, because I knew it was a subject I wanted to touch on in my column.  My first draft (thank heaven there has been a second!) focused on how often I fail at my goal of only interrupting when absolutely necessary.  Suffice it to say, I’m still working on this one.  Once again the children showed me what I needed to do; to refocus on the magic that happens when any of us are left alone to do whatever it is that we need to do and not to see only my failures here.

How many times do we mothers look at each other and sigh when we remember those pre-children days when we could finish something when first we sat down to do it?  Being interrupted is part of being a parent, but shouldn’t we strive to let our children experience the joy of “long enough” now?  Not interrupting them gives them the chance to follow that train of thought to wherever the end may be, to put on those last finishing touches on a
project, to sing through to the last verse of “99 bottles of beer on the wall” at least once in their lives.  (I didn’t say you had to be in the same room while it was going on.   )

So, next time I start to interrupt my children I’m going to try to stop myself first and ask if what I’m interrupting them for is really more important than what they are doing.  I can always write myself a note to tell them later, but this precious moment, these thoughts and ideas, will only come this once.

copyright 1998 Carol Burris  Originally published in my local homeschooling group, HELPS, newsletter